The Details

I’ve been asked for details … because  I’m terribly paranoid about putting information on the internet, I’ll be sending out the birthday and other specifics in the birth announcements.  (I think I have everyone’s snail mail addresses – I updated them last Christmas before I decided I wasn’t mailing out Christmas cards.)

No, J (our new little one) doesn’t look like a newborn.  Look at his round little face!

There is a reason for that.  J was a c-section baby, so he didn’t have to get squished on his way out.  It was, in fact, a planned c-sec.  Now, those of you who know me are wondering why I had a planned c-sec …

Well, it all started when L was born.  She was only 7 lbs 8 oz, but she got stuck (for more information, google “shoulder dystocia”).  L was a moderate shoulder dystocia, which means the doctor had to manipulate and maneuver her to get her out.  Lucky for us, she didn’t suffer any permanent injuries, and she didn’t need to have her collarbone broken, which sometimes happens.

When I got pregnant with S, my OB in Virginia wanted to deliver her c-sec.  He quoted statistics at me: any normal woman walking into a delivery has a .05% chance of having a shoulder dystocia.  A woman with a previous shoulder dystocia has a 15% chance of having another shoulder dystocia.  That means my chances of having another baby get stuck were 300 times higher. 

But still, I objected, and I talked my OBs into inducing me early and letting me try and deliver S naturally.  I had a fantastic friend/doula there to help me, the nurses were great, and S was delivered with absolutely no problem.

When I went into my OB here, pregnant with J, they reminded me that an elective c-sec was an option.  I blew them off.  But as time went on, and my belly got bigger, the idea of a c-sec returned to my mind again and again.  I was convinced J was bigger than L had been, and I started worrying more and more that there would be problems with a vaginal birth.  I made up a list of pros and cons and kept poor C up until late at night talking to him about how I felt.

When I finally settled on an elective c-sec, all my worries stopped.  I hardly thought about it anymore.  In fact, I didn’t second guess my decision until I was in the hospital that morning, and the nurse was getting my vitals and getting me ready.  I started feeling anxious … but as soon as I did, I felt a little voice in my head say, “This is the right choice.  You will be okay.  Everything will be okay.”

Then again, just as they’d put the spinal block in and I was I was letting them lay me down on the table, I got the distinct impression, “You would have ended up here anyway, and this way, you’re a lot better off going into it.”

Now, I can’t say exactly what might have happened if we’d tried to have a vaginal delivery.  I’ll obviously never know.  But we do know they delivered J at 8 lbs even, a full half pound larger than L was.  Both the pediatric nurse and my OB commented that, “If your 7 lb 8 oz baby got stuck, we’d have never gotten this little boy out.” 

I will say, if you have the choice, a c-sec is a miserable way to have a baby.  I didn’t like the procedure, and recovery has been wretched. 

But no matter how he got here, we’re glad we have our Baby J.  He is such a laid-back little boy, and a good eater.  He’s working on sleeping – he does just fine in my arms all night, but I’d prefer to have him in his bassinette.  He’s also the first of my kids to really not like his pacifier – although he will rarely take it when I’m changing his diaper and it calms him down for a few minutes. 

… and you should see the look C gets on his face when he holds his own little baby boy!