Crossing the Finish Line

I knew when I started writing this month that I was pushing myself.  I’d done NaNo, and managed to “win” three times before, but I also knew how much work it was.  I was right.  Writing 80,000 words in a month averages out to 2,667 words per day. 

I don’t set out to do NaNo with the illusion that I’ll have a finished novel at the end of the month.  I see it as a writing exercise and a way to improve.  There were a few things I learned this month.

1.  I can write 1,000 words in about a half hour, if I know what I’m writing, and I’m excited about it.  One night I even found myself thinking, “Oh, I’ve just got 1,000 words left to hit par for the day.  I’ll just whip that out, and then I can make dinner.”

2. I’m not always thrilled about everything I write.  Sometimes my characters seem flat and dull.   Sometimes the story seems to be dragging on and on.  Sometimes I think I ought to delete the whole word file and try again next year.

3.  BUT … even when it’s rough going, I still find little gems.  A character does something unexpected, I write a sentence I’m particularly fond of, or I get to use the term “fluid dynamics” in my novel, and it makes me smile.

4.  Now that I have a novel (not this one, a previous one that wasn’t a NaNo project) that I have cleaned up and am ready to start submitting to agents, it’s easier for me to cut myself some slack.  Yes, this novel as it is, all 80, 559 words of it, is a horrible piece of junk.  It needs major revising, two characters need their backgrounds (and their attitudes) adjusted, and I need to add a number of scenes in the middle and at the end.  But I have hope.  It can be done.  It will not always linger in the miserable state it is now in.

I leave you with a character sketch I wrote before starting the novel.  May I introduce my antagonist, Enez Bozwell. 

Enez felt his body hit the water. It swallowed him whole, lapping over his limbs and head to encompass him. It was cool, and after the beating his pale skin had taken from the sun that day, it was almost a relief. Almost.

Enez panicked. His lungs burned and begged for sweet air, but reach as he did for the light glinting off the surface of the water, he couldn't lift himself up. He didn't know how to swim. His body drifted slowly downward, the light receding. Enez opened his mouth to curse his mother, but only a bubble escaped. He closed his lips against the rush of water and wondered how long it would take him to drown.

It was his mother's fault. His father had met her on a trip to the mainland, and she wasn't used to the ways of the people of Ao'Ha. She'd watched them swimming in the canals that flowed like streets through the city and shuddered. No child of hers would swim in filth. And he never did. But try avoiding the water in a city that rises and falls with the tide. Every bridge crossing, every boat ride, every glimpse of the blue expanse beneath him sent icy fear down his limbs. The water would be the end of him, Enez always knew it. And today, the end had finally come.

Enez watched the light dwindle, feeling the water pressing down on him. He didn’t leave much at the surface. His mother was long gone, and his father had stopped speaking to him more than a decade ago. He'd never had friends, only a few people who didn't mock him outright in school, or now at work. His students would dance under his memorial, if anyone bothered to put one up for him. No, he had no love for the world that had shown him little kindness.

Enez stretched his arms to his sides, as if to embrace the end. His heart burned with longing that equaled the craving in his lungs. He'd been rejected, but he yearned to bask in love, hungered for praise and admiration. Alas, his end had arrived.

The deep blue of the water flickered with a green glow. Enez wondered if it was a trick of his mind, the pressure beginning to turn his brain to mush. Now a shape appeared in the center of the lights. A woman. Enez had always wanted to find a woman … This one was beautiful. She swam with an unnatural speed and grace. Her hair streamed behind her as she swam, but as she stopped, floating in front of him in the water, it floated in a halo around her face. She smiled. Her arms reached out and took his hands, bringing them together and cupping them in hers.

Enez's hands grew warm, and the tingling pain from lack of oxygen seemed to seep away. The warmth traveled up his arms. It reached his chest, then spread into his legs and up into his head. Enez stared into the green woman's eyes. He found himself smiling back. She reached up and stroked his face tenderly. A song echoed in the water, calling, and the woman turned. One glance back and she dropped his hands. She disappeared back into the darkness.

Enez watched her go and took a deep breath. Water flowed into his lungs, warm and tingling, quenching his hunger. Enez stared after the woman in wonder. Where had she gone? And what had she done to him?

We’ve been sick

They sat on the couch like this for the entire movie.  They didn’t budge.  Their blankets stayed tucked up to their little necks, and only their baby heads were left sticking out, their sad eyes peering at me. 

J had it first, then me, then C, then S, and finally L.  Now that we’ve all gotten through it, I’m hoping we’ll have a few weeks of health.

Also, J learned how to climb on his crib.  I knew the day was coming.  He’s older than either of the girls were when we moved them to beds.

 

I don’t like to put my babies up in a bed when they’re just going to fall off, so I throw down a mattress on the floor for them.  J is so thrilled to have a big bed.  The girls immediately jumped onto it.  C quickly reminded them, “Do you let J get on your bed? No? Then get off his bed!”  The girls couldn’t argue, and J now knows he can kick his sisters off his bed.

Oh, and J finally fits into a shirt my grandma gave me when he was born (Thanks, Grandma!).  It says, “I wanna grow up to be a BYU Cougar”, and it has a little cougar on it.  Adorable.  He loves it. 

Scarves and Poodle Skirts …

SO, last Friday, L was sick as a dog, puking and lying around the house like she was ready to die.  Her teacher called me to let me know that Monday (today) was going to be the 50th day of school this year.  The first graders were celebrating with a 50’s day.  Since she wasn’t at school to get a flier, she called to let me know.  I thought that was very nice of her.

I didn’t have a cardigan that fit L, and I definitely didn’t have a poodle skirt.  I also had a jam-packed Saturday.  I figured, probably only a few kids would dress up anyway, no big deal.  L would be a little disappointed, but she would live.

Fast forward to this morning.  I was 4 min into my workout on my treadmill, just starting to break a sweat, when the phone rang.  It was L’s teacher.  L was the only girl who wasn’t dressed up.  At first she said she’d be okay.  Then she came back, tears in her eyes, and asked her teacher if she could call me.

Break my heart!

So …

Pink Rick Rack …. $1.79

XL White Poodle Applique … $3.59

1.38 yards Pink Felt …  $4.85

(Not to mention breaking the world’s record for fastest poodle skirt crafted from scratch – less than 30 min!)

Putting a smile on my baby’s sweet face … Priceless!

NaNo Update

I’ve set a goal for myself to try and hit 80k this year (the NaNo “win” is 50,000).  Maybe it’s because I’m insane, or maybe it’s because I figure it will take about that much to finish the story that’s unraveling in my head.  The good news is, I’m on track to hit 80k!  I crossed the 25k line yesterday and finished today just short of 28k. 

I love the way the stories unravel in my mind.  I will admit that, after working so much on my last novel, it was hard to get into this one.  It’s like waking up in the morning and trying to put on someone else’s jeans.  It felt funny to dive into the life of a whole new character, and since I write fantasy, a whole new world.  I spent the first 5-10k just feeling it out and getting to know my way around.  I’m writing this novel in first person, so the first few chapters are stunted and awkward while I struggled to find her voice.  But that’s okay.  I can fix that later.  The point of NaNo is to get it on paper and to give yourself something to work with.

While it’s true that writing a whole novel in a month makes for a VERY rough draft, there are a few shining moments I’ve stumbled across.  I’m not going to bother with backstory, but in case you’re interested, here’s a bit of my favorite scene so far.  Enjoy!

It made me mad.

I looked down at the group of kids in front of me. There was the smallest space between them and some tittering boys. I knew what I wanted to do, what I thought was the right thing to do, but it took every ounce of willpower in my body to force myself forward.

"Do what you have to do," I murmured under my breath. "One step at a time."

First I put my hand on the shoulder of the girl in front of me. I nudged her gently and slid out from behind her. Then I stepped forward. Once. Twice. Three strides until I stood between Teon and Elona. I looked at Elona and tried to give her a small smile before turning to Teon. He stared at me as if I were an unicorn … or maybe a troll. Something that should not have been there, but inexplicably was.

Teon's ocean eyes stared back at me, and suddenly I had another reason to be mad at him. If he thought his nymph magic made him better than these other people, gave him a right to treat them like this, he was wrong. A sudden realization hit me, brought to my attention by the swelling pressure of the situation. Nymph magic was only ever used to protect Ao'Ha and its citizens. If that was the case, I was a guardian, too.

I threw back my shoulders and lifted my chin. I could still remember the way his lips felt on mine last night. Maybe that was why he didn't intimidate me anymore.

"Just who do you think you are?" I said. My voice rumbled up from my chest. "Elona's right. If you needed help with your college essays, you could have asked her. She's a nice person, and you two are friends. She would have helped you."

I didn't take my eyes off Teon, and he seemed transfixed by me. "Isn't that right Elona?"

She sniffed and gasped behind me, but she didn't contradict me.

"But you knew that you're so sexy and so popular, and you thought it would be fun to toy with her, just because you can!" I let my tone lift and mock him. Even as I stood there, in the midst of my rant, I surprised myself. Only three days ago, I'd cowered from him. I could see he was just as shocked as I was. But I wasn't finished, yet.

"Teon, you are an insult to your namesake. Teon'Atel the wise …" somehow that didn't seem enough, so I elaborated, remembering the tale of Teon'Atel and Aaia, "… and lover of nymphs, you are not. You'd have been better named Ulron!"

My voice echoed down the hallway, joined by a few gasps. Ulron, the god of misfortune, was blamed for anything that went wrong on the island. While you could attribute happenings to him, no one ever crossed the line and compared him to a person. That was just too low.

Too low, maybe, but if I was the only one to say it, there were others who agreed.

"Tell 'im, Ulee!" Leagh called. I didn't know she even knew my name. She walked over and put her arm around Elona. Murmurs of agreement rose from the crowd. Teon was still the star polo player, and no one was willing to bring his ire down on themselves, but it was quickly obvious whose side they were on.

Teon's eyes scanned the crowd and then focused on me. They narrowed.

"Crazy orphan," he chuckled. "Who even cares what you think?"

What my kids said …

The night of the election, C went to do his civic duty and be an usher at our local polling place.  He told the kids he was going to the election and left.  As for us, I got the kids ready for bed.  Then we knelt down to have family prayer.  It was my turn.  Somewhere in my prayer I said this:

“Please bless whoever is elected to be President, that they will lead our country to a better place in the next four years.”

L looked up at me after the prayer was over and asked, “Who is the President?”

I was astounded at the idea that my six year old didn’t know who the President of the United States was.  But really, when had I ever taken the time to explain US Government to her?  So I said, “The President is one of the people who helps lead the United States of America, where we live.  He helps run the government.”  (I considered adding the House of Representatives, the Senate, and the Supreme Court to my explanation, and I ached to elaborate on the separation of powers and how unique and wonderful our system of government is … or at least was, at the time the Founding Fathers designed it … but I stopped myself.  She is only six.)

L looked up at me with wide eyes and said, “Oh!  Is Daddy  the President?!!!”

…. um, you know, because Daddy went to the election tonight.  Right.

…………………………….

S sat down for lunch today and found me making her a sandwich.

“I don’t want peanut butter and jelly!” she insisted.

“You wouldn’t tell me what you wanted, and I’ve already started making this sandwich for you.  Too late to change your mind.  This is what you get.” I informed her.

“Well, can you at least make it like Daddy makes them?  Lots of strawberry jam!”  She starts gesturing with her hands wildly, “Like, jam just drippppppppppppppppping out of it all over!”

Yep, C makes much tastier pb&j than me. 

Birthday Girl!

We had another birthday this month.  S turned five!  I can’t believe how big she’s getting!

She was excited to open her presents. 

Problem was, we had only just taught J what it was to have a birthday and open presents, and he was quite put out when he realized the presents were not for him.   He cried the whole time S was opening presents, and he only stopped crying when I told him he had to, or he wouldn’t get any cake. 

She wanted a car, since she’d seen J get cars for his birthday.

She wanted a dinosaur …

And of course, something girly.  She loves Cinderella, and she’s thrilled to have her own prince, now.

Yes, I’m five now, can we please eat cake?

Classic, from scratch, yellow butter cake with sticky cinnamon bun ice cream.  Yum!

This one found his smile when I gave him some ice cream.  He doesn’t care for cake, but the ice cream was good.

And last, a happy big sister who has a hard time waiting three more months for her turn.

Grandma came a few days later to spend a Saturday with us and brought S’s last present.

 

We took a trip up to Boise on Saturday to walk through the Temple Open House. 

Happy Birthday, Sweet S!

Halloween 2012

The advantage of making my costumes too big last year is that they still fit this year.  And a miracle of sorts happened, and my kids actually wanted to wear them again!

That works out nicely for me, because I don’t have to do anything, and we’re ready for Halloween.

Except this little one refused to dress up.  He’d barely wear his cowboy hat at all.  He did figure out the trick or treating, but by the end of it, I was carrying his bucket while he munched on candy (Yes, I do check my children’s candy before they are allowed to eat it generally … but how exactly do you “check” a lollipop?)

Notice that J’s pumpkin is bigger than he is.  That’s what happens when the guy at the pumpkin patch says, “Oh, it’s probably 0nly a 30 pounder.  That’s only about $5!”  … but when he puts it on the scale, after y0u’ve told your son he can have it, it weighs in at 46 pounds!  Lugging that thing around was a chore!  (… but it was worth it, J just loved his BIG pumpkin!)

This was in honor of the spider he smooshed with his bare hands.

The look on her face just kills me!

“This is what I want it to look like, Mom!”

“Alrighty, sweetheart!”  Those are actually her hands carved into the pumpkin.

“Just make mine like L’s.  I’m good.”

S managed to pick out a pumpkin that wouldn’t stand up on its own, so we had to keep propping it up against the other two.

I tried to get a good picture of all three of them together.

But we were a little wiggly and ready to leave.

J looked really good in this one …

And then we were done!

We had a great time today.  S had preschool here this morning, and we had a little Halloween party.  Then we went to L’s school where we had a parade and her party.  We finished off the night with Trunk or Treating at the church. 

Hope you all had a Happy Halloween!